This week has been nuts with two sick kids, teaching, and life in general. My dear friend, Alicia Medford, has made it clear to me that I am not allowed to skip Wife Wednesday ever again. Not wanting to disappoint her, I asked her to guest post. Now don't get confused: Alicia's husband's name is Rob, too! Alicia is a dear friend, a wonderful mom & wife, a basketball player, and a bargain shopper. My Rob had the privilege of marrying Alicia and her Rob. We have mommy and kid play dates regularly, and we're looking forward to more adventures this summer! Rob and Alicia are expecting their third son this June! Watch out Duggars. Love you Alicia! Thanks for the post!
Top 5 Rules I Live by as a Wife
1.
Pursue
Jesus: When I am pursuing Jesus in my daily life, it leads me to love Rob
more than I love myself. It leads me to acknowledge that he is the provider,
leader, and protector that God has entrusted us to follow. Pursuing Jesus
allows for me to see less of his flaws, more of his gifts, and provides power
against Satan trying to get a foothold into our marriage. One night in our
first year of marriage, Rob and I were talking and I said to him, “Loving you
is worship to my Savior”. Worshiping God is daily. It’s a lifestyle. When I do
my best as a wife, I believe that is worship to my God who gave me this journey
and life to live.
2.
Respect:
Bite my tongue, not physically, that hurts, but figuratively. I made a promise
to myself before Rob and I got married that I would not become one of those
wives who bad-mouthed, bashed, belittled, or talked negatively about him to
anyone. He is an amazing husband and father; his flaws should not be held
against him, including by me.
3.
Prioritize:
Rob is a firefighter and works 24 hour shifts every other day. I prioritize my
time around HIS schedule. It’s not the other way around. We have a lot of time
together, but have a lot of time apart too. On days Rob is working I do things
like: clean, go to play dates, hang out with friends, shop for the kids/house, watch
what I want to watch on TV. On days when Rob is home I don’t do any of those
things, except what is necessary. I believe that maximizing our time together
as a couple and family is more important than cleaning the house, having a play
date, or “me” time. When he is home I
can focus my energy and attention on him, our family, and our marriage.
4.
Communicate:
We talk about everything. Neither of us buys things without the other knowing and
authentically receiving permission. I tell him when he hurts my feelings. He
tells me when I need to change a behavior or attitude. There is no fear of judgment,
ridicule or even anger. We feel blessed that God has put us together and
overall we communicate very well, but the reason we do so is because we have no
secrets, tell it like it is, and have 100% trust in each other’s decision
making and motives.
5. Bed: This rule is two-fold. First, our
kids (Elijah, 6; Abram, 15mo), have 7pm-7:30pm bedtimes. 7ish bedtime allows
for Rob and I to still have an entire evening to spend quality time together. I
believe firmly that kids need sleep and parents need time ALONE together. The second part of this rule is that Rob and
I go to bed together. Obviously not possible when he is working, but possible
when he is not. Sometimes this means one of us goes to bed not really “tired”
but because it’s a rule, we have followed it almost every night of our
marriage.
